The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational asked readers to take any word from
the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and
supply a new definition. Here is an edited version of this year's winners.
1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you
realize it was your money to start with.
2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright
ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign
of breaking down in the near future.
4. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject
financially impotent for an indefinite period.
5. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray painted very, very high.
6. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who
doesn't get it.
7. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
8. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
9. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.
10. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really
bad vibes, right? And then, like, the earth explodes and it's, like, a
serious bummer.
11. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming
only things that are good for you.
12. Glibido: All talk and no action.
13. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they
come at you rapidly.
14. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've
accidentally walked through a spider web.
15. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your
bedroom at 3:00 a.m. and cannot be cast out.
16. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the
fruit you're e ating.
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