for just one second

I wish a certain banned member back for her perspective on this topic. I know it would be in keeping with mine, but her presentation of it would be ever so more eloquent.

Again, how is that different from God not being there at all? I know I'm hammering on this point, and I know it's an uncomfortable one, but if the claim "God will help us when we pray" just boils down to "You can go to a shrink"...

I know this is nowhere near the magnitude of what your loved one has suffered, but I keep thinking about the time it takes to heal from a physical wound, and the process by which the human body heals. It is by God's magnificent power that we are healed--and though He has the power to heal instantaneously, instantaneous healing is something I've never witnessed in all my life. Healing over time is no less miraculous, however.

[Sorry this post sounds disjointed, I've a couple of thoughts to share.]

There are wounds that heal with scarring. Wounds that heal with scarring and leave no sensation to touch. (I've several physical scars that have living tissue but have no feeling whatsoever.)
...
Is it possible to consider that God IS doing the healing? That it is a process, and not just a "wait" situation. Possible that emotional numbness is necessary in healing--beneficial even to the healing process itself?
...
I had a broken leg in 1993. For at least an hour after I'd broken the leg, I was struck "numb" from the knee down. I could not move my leg, nor even stand from a sitting position.
...
I think of the pain killers the doctors administer in the hospital--pain killers administered so that the healing process might take faster than otherwise. (Studies within the past 10 years have shown shorter healing times for those who adhere to a pain-relieving regimen.)

[See PM]

It could be, I guess. But again, the claim is that God can do miracles, and could instantaneously heal a broken leg if he so chose. Apparently he chooses not to.

I don't know about your particular situation, so I'm just speaking in general. I have seen many times where God works tremendously, over a period of time, through a trained counselor. If you're asking for an instant miracle, then you're right, God rarely chooses to work that way. Maybe because most of us need to learn patience, I don't know.

You've probably heard the story of the guy who prayed for help and then proceeded to turn away several people who stopped by to help because he was waiting for God to perform a miracle. That night he asked God why He hadn't helped him, and God reminded him of all the people He had sent to help him that day. That's kind of a simple illustration of what I'm talking about.

God does not leave us alone. He can guide us to a particular counselor or doctor or whoever that He can work through to bring healing. He normally chooses to work through other people. The only thing I have ever seen God work a miracle with - in sexual and other abuse situations - is with regard to forgiving the abuser. Most people cannot do that on their own, and it comes toward the end of the healing process.

It's hard to know why He doesn't heal everyone instantly when they are in pain or sorrow. But sometimes he glorifies His name in SPITE of the ailment.

This is also hard to understand, but I guess it is true that there would be no stories of courage without circumstances which demand courage.

To me, the issue of pain and suffering is not at all hard to understand. It is entirely related with the issue of sin. If God came in and interfered with the results of sin all the time, we and the rest of the universe wouldn't be able to get a true picture of sin and its results. We might not think sin is so bad or sense our need of a savior. It is important that the universe see where sin leads and how sin affects much more than the person doing it, and how evil and insidious it really is, so that there will never be any doubt, through eternity, as to the character of God.

I do totally understand how it's hard to appreciate that when you're the one suffering, though.

That's an interesting viewpoint, carolaa. I can see your position, and it makes sense.

1. Our situation is what it is - and vastly wonderful in almost all ways. We are in love and have a great family. Life is just tougher than it needs to be for Suzie, through no fault of her own, and she gets angry for the reason discussed next.

2. I understand all the points being made about the time taken, and the consequences of sin, and all that. The issue, then, is that Christians need to change their pitch. They keep making these claims about the miracles God will do if we only ask. But clearly he doesn't do them, for whatever reasons. So then they go into a whole long list of rationalisations and reasons why not. It would be much less heartbreaking not to talk about the miracles at all, if they're not really available. If what Suzie needs to do is go to a counsellor and have years of therapy, then that's what needs to happen. Telling her to pray for healing, with a side order of "and if it doesn't happen it's somehow your fault" is deeply unhelpful.

3. I appreciate all the kind support and efforts to help, but the thread is not about our situation but about faith in God and what he will and won't do.

Bravus, you've made a valid point. I would like to explore that further in the context of emotional sorrow and/or mental illness, but I will open a new thread for that. Please watch for it and I welcome your experienced input.